grieve

it was friday and everyone in the office suggesting, where to have lunch...every end of the week we have lunch out.. some say to aboy's,l'sea,imay's other say malls but they said its a usual place so they decided to eat near at school..its more affordable because its near at school which is nene's wll its good because its a student price and the food is really great..
as we go along to our lunch place..i was sitting in front with ms. happy and behind are my other officemate, i was so silent thinking about something in the past and listening to the music which is a little bit sad..i remember my brother who died a months ago and it happended that our driver made a shortcut to nene's which is along the place my brother die..it just came to my mind.." yeah, i been here before" with all the hope and prayers just to save my brothers life..and i clearly hear my mom voice "i dont want to go back to that place anymore its to much hurts done" ...and suddenly i keep fighting back my tears..and i was new to my self..why should i cry..its done!i put out all the heartaches when my brother buried..i accept all the things that happened..it's done!it's done!...and i saw this store's that i made my coffee and streets that i've walked at the middle of the night to buy towels and soap for my brother's hygiene..all that sad moments that happened in that place flashing back to my mind..his face, his situation before... i feelthat my hands are shaking and i felt excruciating inside..and i can't help but cry..
i thought i get over it..a months maybe its not enough to forget someone so close to you..and i think the aches will keep coming back..